I am happy to say that I worked with Time writer Alana Semuels on this article a couple of months ago. It was worth the wait. Ms Semuels did her homework. I knew that when I talked to her, and it comes across in the article–which, btw, is 8 pages, printed out without the pictures. Why can’t the local press do the same? Well, we know the answer. Underpaid, understaffed, undercurious. and under courageous. A re-hash of a SHBB Inc press release is easier than fact-checking. And WHO and WHY would anyone object to baby abandonment boxes?
SHBBN is linked in the article and Bastard Nation got a plug:
There can also be consequences down the line, say adoptee-rights groups, who argue the complete anonymity of baby boxes makes it nearly impossible for adoptees to gain any information about their birth parents and extended families. “It’s unethical, it denies civil rights to adopted people, it denies the right of the non-relinquishing parent,” says Marley Greiner, the co-founder of Bastard Nation, an adoptee-rights group, who writes the blog Stop Baby Boxes Now!
As I said, Ms Semuels did her homework. There are plenty of references to people on our side–including trad safe haven organizations that actively oppose boxes, that I know personally, and some I’ve never heard of.. Here’s a couple snips:
Oaks argues that safe-haven laws signal a problem with how a society operates and are not a solution to unplanned pregnancies. They create a dichotomy, she says, in which poor women may feel that they have to do the “right thing”: give up their child. Otherwise they risk being a “bad” mother. “My interests are in turning it around and saying, ‘What safety nets are we missing from our society?’” she says. “I don’t want to be in a society where it is condoned for a person to give birth alone, then be responsible for getting the newborn to a certain place in order not to be prosecuted.”
Sometimes new parents just need someone to listen, says Nick Silverio, founder of the Florida nonprofit A Safe Haven for Newborns, which helps women who are considering surrendering their infants (and which opposes baby boxes). Last year, Silverio received a call through his organization’s 24/7 hotline from a weeping mother who had gone to a fire station to surrender her baby and found the station empty. He calmed her down by talking about her baby, he says, and eventually sent her diapers and wipes and helped her come to the decision to keep it.
The article includes a short explanation of the Babyklappe system and the 2014 confidential birth procedures in Germany, which I was somewhat familiar with, but learned more:
Baby boxes in other countries often facilitate the face-to-face interaction missing in the U.S. model. In Germany, for instance, the organization that sponsors baby boxes puts an ad in the paper when a baby gets dropped off offering to help the mother. About half of the time, the mother goes back to the facility to pick up the child, according to one 2018 analysis of the German program.
At the age of 16, those born under the anonymous birth system can receive their mother’s personal information and make contact. I don’t know how this works in real life (not sure if this is retroactive, for instance), and I am not endorsing anonymous /confidential birth in any way, but if it actually works that way, these adoptees appear to have it better than the majority of adopted people in the US today, who were /are not born anonymously but were anonymized by sealed records statutes rooted in archaic cultural beliefs, entitlement, greed, bigotry, and adopteephobia.
Oh, the pearl clutching ! Not surprisingly, Monica Kelsey, CEO-President of Safe Haven Baby Boxes Inc, has not posted this article on her various social media platforms.
But, Mrs. Kelsey did get a high-five from Amanda Mancuso, Deputy Director of Children and Family Services for the Alabama Department of Human Resources. I am actually glad that this absurd comment made the cut. This is one of the absurdities that fuels populist baby box support:
“It’s a fun thing for our foster and adoptive workers,” Mancuso says. Families who want to adopt usually want babies, and through these surrenders, care workers can make a family’s dream come true. “We have a lot of families who are interested in these children,” she says, “and we want to serve those families and serve those children.”
I don’t know if the hard copy of the article is on th newsstands yet, but I plan to check out my nearby Barnes & Noble today or tomorrow.
Thanks to Alama Semuels to letting in the light.
About Marley
Marley Greiner is the Executive Chair and co-founder of Bastard Nation: the Adoptee Rights Organization, the largest adoptee civil rights organization in the United States. She writes extensively on issues concerning adoptee rights, safe haven baby boxes, and other issues impacting adopted people. Read more.
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