It’s the white lies, the prevarication, the embroidery, the arrogance and contempt—Mrs.Kelsey’s attitude towards the family medical question–that is the problem. Her response to the relatively soft medical history concern exemplifies her prediculous contempt and adopteephobic attitude toward us. Our horribly complex and varied adoptive experiences, rooted in class, race, economics, misogny, religion and culture, are too complicated and unpopular to be contained in her ego-driven babybox narrative. They and we best be marginalized and avoided.