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MEOW!!!!!!!!!Did you know that a Safe Haven/Safe Haven Baby Box “legal” surrender abandonment is nothing more than a closed adoption plan?
Neither did I, but…
… that’s what Monica Kesley, founder/CEO of Safe Haven Baby Box Inc. posted on Facebook (April 19, 2025). The post received dozens of shares and emojis with no one challenging the spurious claim. Did you expect any better? I have always opposed “adoption education” in the school curriculum. Now, I think I was wrong.
Of all the misinformation prevarications, and out-and-out lies that SHBB Inc has propagated about adoption and baby abandonment boxes over the years, the idea that baby boxng is simply a “closed adoption” plan is the greatest. It tells pregnant women and new mothers concerned with adoption privacy issues, as well as the uninformed public, that boxing a baby is a traditional and normal adoption plan. It reminds me of a case in Columbus, Ohio, where a mother considering adoption was advised by a hospital social worker that Safe Haven is a “Christian adoption plan,” with not a word about anonymous adoption severance.
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Closed adoptions are not “anonymous adoptions.” Baby Boxings are anonymous “surrender. Big difference.
There is, in fact, no legal entity as “anonymous adoption ” except in Mrs Kelsey’s untrained mind. I never heard the term “anonymous adoption” used in any serious manner (outside of bastard snark) until about 4 years ago when Adopteephobic Politicians & Associates began to use the term to defend their seedy agendas.
This Kelseyian newspeak simply distorts adoption law and practice and confuses anyone unfamiliar with adoption language and operations. What she means is anonymous legal baby surrender dumping, where she fetes “loving mamas” for abandoning their babies–a universally condemned act for thousands of years–by depositing them in a permanent archaic legal and emotional black hole. I am sure that even the most virulent adoptacrat short of Georgia Tann would be happy to explain it all to Mrs Kelsey. Until that discussion happens, however, I will put it in the vernacular: the idea that “closed adoption” is synonymous with anonymity is unprofessional and plain nuts.
A closed adoption is an adoption where the biological and adoptive parent(s) generally speaking* are unknown to each other; identities and other information about themselves and the adoptee are not shared, but held “confidential” by various government and private institutions. No letters. No gifts. No visits…but
…Original birth certificates, biological parent identities, family, social and medical histories, counseling notes, relinquishment papers, court orders, and scads of other paperwork are all maintained by law and professional requirements (some better than others) in that closed system .
Vital Stats clerks, adoption agencies, social workers, interns, judges, lawyers. law clerks, paralegals, secretaries, receptionists, temps, governmental departments and agencies, doctors, nurses, lab techs, even janitors have access to adoption records and files, or at least, have ways to obtain them. And let’s not forget that laws change.
The people who can’t access that information that all these other people can with little effort are the individuals that the information pertains to –adoptees. Adoptees by law, aren’t’ even considered a party to their own adoptions–like the used cars.
Box Babies have it even worse than “regular” adoptees whose birth and adoption records exist. They are difficult to obtain but they exist. Pre-box records don’t exist, for Box Babies, but if they by chance do ,the files are locked up in Mrs Kelsey’s confidential “family registry” cabinet in W0odburn, Indiana, only obtainable through her largesse –a private individual not accountable to any current law. It’s all crazy–and insulting to Class Class Bastard– I know! MEOW!!!!!!
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Now that I think about it, Mrs Kelsey may not be misinforming, prevaricating, or even lying out her nose. She believes her own made-up “facts” because she knows jack (or doesn;t are)about adoption: its history, how it works, its legal applications, standards, and ramifications, bio parent coercion, its politics and weaponization, its deleterious impact on adopted people and their families. For her, “adoption is beautiful” She occasionally admits that some adoptions aren’t “beautiful” but those are anomalies. Just like her hotline counselor and coordinator Pam Stenzel (also adopted) thinks that adopted people who oppose baby boxes are mentally challenged anomalies that should be grateful for the company’s work in keeping us, our histories, families, and records secret–and spreading the word that “mothers demand anonymity. And incidently, give politicians an excuse to boot us out of the backdoor of the statehouse.
For Mrs Kelsey adoption–especially her brand of adoption-by box– is all about placing “her “newborns into the loving arms of deserving “forever” families. She promises to walk beside Box Babies, like Jesus walks beside her. Baby Boxing is her personal redemption, a way to feel good about her own origins and adoption. She initiated her own successful search and reunion but wants to deny–by law– information and reunions for others. effectively making hersel the gateway for any information an adult Box Baby can access. I would call Mrs Kelsey a self-hating bastard only that is an insult to bastards who fight every day for restoration of adoptee civil rights and dignity–something she does not believe they need or deserve.
Note to Mrs Kelsey: Call it what it is: anonymous baby abandonment. Not closed adoption. No anonymous adoption, Not closed anonymous adoption. Adopted people may not like “closed adoption, but they sure know the difference between it and therapeutic baby dumping.
This is just plain kitty litter!
*Open adoptions are not legally enforceable. A substantial number of open adoptions are closed by adopters after adoption finalization—some shortly after and others years down the road. Closed adoptions can also be ordered due to safety concerns for the child, but identities might be known.
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